Cudfink Cuthfink Cuthbert

'No, really,' Cuthbert insisted as he watched the other heroes parry across what was probably a beautiful tiled floor when it wasn't trampled with dirt and blood and teeth. 'How can I win this tournament?'

'No, really,' Dave replied dryly, 'you can't. You're not good enough to defeat the best swordsman in the land. You'll never be good enough to defeat the best swordsman in the land. That's why she's called the best swordsman in the land,' Dave pointed out, 'and you're called Cudfink.'

'Cuthfink,' Cuthbert corrected. 'And I'm not, I'm called Cuthbert,' he added quickly.